I don’t subscribe to the stereotypical whitewashing of a group of people simply becasue they do a particular job. You know the sort of thing I’m referring to …. “Oh he’s a traffic warden is he? Bunch of little Hitlers all of them!”
However see what you make of this.
My doctor’s surgery runs a telephone repeat prescription order line. This means you call a number tell the nice lady at the other end you’d like another supply of mind numbing drugs and then pop in two days later to collect the prescription. Yay!
So Monday, having noticed I was down to a tab or three in the box, I wrang, it was engaged; I rang again and again and again and again and again and again ……. I’m sure you’ve got the idea by now.
So quite exhausted I left it until yesterday. The line opens at 11.00am, so I called at 10.59 and 30 seconds, the line was closed save for a recorded message telling me that it opened at 11.00am, so I immediately rang back as it was now 11.00am and 10 seconds and ……. it was engaged!
So I rang again and again and again and again ……. I’m sure you’ve got the idea by now. Then at half past noon I thought “Sod this” and phoned the surgery on the normal line. It rang twice and was answered.
“So and So’s surgery, how can I help you?” Now following the conversation that ensued I have decided to buy the receptionist a dictionary so she can look up the word “Help” I’d hate her to continue labouring under the misapprehension that it means “obstructive, lacking initiative, rule bound, cracked record”
The jolly chat went like this: -
Hello, I’d like to order a repeat prescription thank you
No, you have to ring the prescription hotline, the number is 024 76……….
Thank you, but that’s pointless, I was ringing it all day yesterday and continually from 11.00am this morning it is constantly engaged, so if you take my details and pass them on please.
No, you have to ring the prescription hotline.
I’ve just explained that I have wasted a day and a half trying to do that, so I need you to pass it on to them please.
No, you have to ring the prescription hotline, because that’s how it works.
But it doesn’t work. My name is Cl_____ I need Venlafaxine……
Hold on a minute, you have to ring the prescription hotline, because that’s what we have to do.
Eh? I thought they were in the surgery.
We have to ring the prescription hotline if we need them because that’s the procedure.
I’m not interested in your procedures, don’t try to make them my problem, they’re your problem. So where is the lady that operates this “HOTLINE”?
Well she is in this building.
Really? Where exactly?
She sits behind me.
Ok, then please turn around and tap her on the shoulder and tell her I need Venlafaxine.
It doesn’t work like that, you have to ring her on the prescription hotline.
This is ridiculous, please pass her this phone and I’ll ask her myself.
I can’t do that, this is the reception phone not the prescription hotline phone.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10…… Let me talk to the Practice manager then.
You can’t talk to her.
Yes I can
No you can’t she’s in a room with a doctor, and I ‘m not disturbing her with this.
That’s ok, I can appreciate how much more important a doctor is than I am. I’ll talk to her deputy then.
She’s busy as well.
Why what’s she doing then?
She’s manning the prescription hotline.
Would you tell her someone wants to talk her to in her deputy manager role.
Certainly, just a minute.
Hello can I help you?
Yes please I’d like a repeat prescription thank you.
Certainly, what’s your name, date of birth and the medication you need?
It’s no wonder I need the drugs to keep me sane, how do you other poor buggers cope?
